Your Rainforest Mind

Support For The Excessively Curious, Creative, Smart & Sensitive


37 Comments

Dealing with Anxiety When You Are a Highly Sensitive Overthinker*

photo courtesy of Toa Heftiba, Unsplash

There are so many reasons to be anxious these days. So many reasons. What’s a sensitive, empathetic, intuitive, analytical person to do?

I don’t need to tell you what there is to be anxious about. You are quite aware of the little things and the big things and all of the things in between. You could create a very long list. Your capacity for super-thinking and your vast imagination, enormous empathy, and non-stop brain has already added 14 items to your list since you started reading this post.

And, that’s not even taking into consideration that you might be a parent. A person with children. You can just double and triple and quadruple your list of reasons if you made the choice to bring a little vulnerable being into the world. Not that I’m judging you. But, really. What were you thinking? And you thought you were a worrier before you had kids.

I’ve written about this before here and here because it’s such a real phenomenon for people with finely tuned nervous systems, which you know you have. Not to mention, your capacity to feel the suffering of neighbors, trees, children everywhere, and your lonely Aunt Lucille.

Not only that. If you had to start worrying when you were two years old because your mother was screaming obscenities at you and your father was unreliable and self-absorbed, for example, well then, you likely have developed a remarkable ability to become anxious at a moment’s notice. Or to remain anxious all of the time on all occasions (called hypervigilance**) Just in case. You never know. You need to be prepared for the worst.

So, my darlings, you see?  Stop berating yourself for your worrying ways. Stop pressuring yourself to be cool, calm, and collected because you’re so smart. There are reasons for your extraordinary capacity to worry.

I have a suggestion.

In addition to all of the tools and techniques listed in the many articles out there, here’s another that I’ve recently started to practice more regularly. That I’ve found surprisingly helpful.

Here it is.

You know how fear tends to make you want to freeze or shrink or hide or push it away? Instead, notice it and be with it. Where do you feel it in your body? Hello, anxiety. Then, remember that it’s just a part of you. And you are bigger than it. Imagine yourself expanding. Breathe and expand. As odd as it sounds, welcome the anxiety. Bring it on, baby! And keep expanding. You will begin to feel your higher Self and the Love that is in you and around you. Breathe. You might start to notice that you feel lighter and more peaceful. The fear may still be there but you’ve become so large that it becomes insignificant. Imagine that!

The more you practice this, the easier it will be to get into this more peaceful state. And if you want to take it one step further, turn it into a tonglen practice (from Pema Chodron) where you breathe in all of the anxiety all over the world (Seriously!), and you breathe out Love to everyone, including yourself.

Including yourself.

__________________________

To my bloggEEs: I’m breathing Love to you right now, my little chickadees. Tell us about your anxiety and your worries. What do you do that is helpful? If you try this technique, let us know how it goes. There may be other, more concrete things, to try first. Sometimes, you need to address the basics first and get spiritual later. Trust yourself. If you grew up with chainsaws, give yourself time to heal via many paths.

*For the perfectionists among us: Is overthinker one word? Should it be hyphenated? Is it two words? I hyphenated it in another post so  should I be consistent? Am I over-thinking over thinking? Oh, brother.

** If you have an extreme case of anxiety, due to early trauma, medication may be an option as well. Sometimes the bio-chemical help is needed so that you can manage your life enough to be able to benefit from the other techniques.

 

 

 

 

Advertisements


41 Comments

So Many Worries, So Little Time — Anxiety And Your Creative Mind

photo courtesy Lea Dobedout, Unsplash, CC

photo courtesy Lea Dobedout, Unsplash, CC

If you’re a sensitive, empathetic human, which you know you are, it would be very hard, OK, impossible, not to feel somewhat anxious these days. OK. Maybe very anxious. There are multiple reasons for this. So many opportunities for anxiety. I don’t need to tell you.

And let’s face it. You were born worrying. That very busy mind of yours could think of endless possibilities for concern. The pteradactyl hiding under your bed. Those timed tests in school. Your friends’ drug problems. The bullies on the street corner. The purpose of dark matter. Not to mention your finely tuned vividly accessible imagination. So many worries, so little time.

Then, if you became a parent. Well. What were you thinking? Parenting. Not the best job for the rumination-prone.

But here’s the good news. Your rainforest mind is not just here for apprehension, anxiety and angst. Nooooooo. You, dear friend, also have an enormous capacity to be inspired. To feel awe. To know wonder. And this may save you. (along with the many suggestions in this other post and occasionally shrieking in your car after a particularly vigorous kick boxing class)

You know awe. The night sky. An ocean sunset. Swimming with dolphins. The birth of your child. Listening to Lady Gaga sing ‘Til It Happens to You.

Wonder can take you out of your angst. Even just for a moment. It can allow you to feel your deep knowing. That there’s something larger, more beautiful, more powerful out there and in you. Maybe you call it Beauty. Maybe you call it Love. Maybe you call it Intuition. Maybe you call it String Theory. Maybe you call it God.

Whatever you call it, get yourself some awe. Let wonder back into your life.

It will soothe your worried soul. 

_______________________________

To my blogEEs: Where do you find awe? What inspires you? Tell us about your sense of wonder. What has helped you ease your anxiety? Thank you, dear readers. You inspire me.


30 Comments

The More You Know, The More You Worry

photo from Anne Allanketner

photo from Anne Allanketner

Perhaps you thought that if you were smart, you wouldn’t be a worrier. If you were smart, you’d know all of the answers. You wouldn’t have to be anxious because you could think your way out of any problem.

But, in fact, you may worry constantly. You worry when you’re sleeping. When you’re hiking. When you’re cooking. When you’re driving. When you’re not worrying.

So what’s with that?

Let me explain.

Your very active rainforest mind is able to dream up so many things to worry about. Less complex minds may worry less because there isn’t as much thinking. With you, there’s lots of thinking. And if you’re highly creative? Watch out. Even more worries.

Add to this, your capacity to notice things that others don’t. More to notice, more to worry about.

And, of course, if you have deeply held ethical beliefs around justice issues and if you’re sensitive to the suffering of all beings, then, well, there might be a teensy weensy bit of anxiety in your world.

See what I’m saying?

I understand that you think that you ought to worry less because, as a smart person, you’re supposed to be a great problem solver. And maybe you are a great problem solver.

That may not stop the worry.

Of course, there might be complicating factors. Trauma in childhood might make you anxious today. Pressure and expectations due to your smartness might make you nervous. Hormone imbalances and illness might cause anxiety. You could be a parent.

Complicating factors.

It’s not easy to sort it all out. But I’m here to suggest that there’s a connection between your rainforest mind and your capacity for worry.

What, then, can be done, when a lobotomy isn’t an option?

1. Read this other post with its list of fabulous suggestions. Then, do some of them.

2. Try one of the research-based guided imagery CDs produced by psychologist Belleruth Naparstek. She has CDs on anxiety, stress reduction and many more topics.

3. Read the research from the Heartmath Institute and see if you might want to try one of their devices to improve what they call your “heart rate variability” and reduce your stress.

4. Experiment with a technique called yoga nidra. It’s one way to calm your nervous system and feel connected to the earth and your spirituality. There are free recorded guided meditations here.

5. Get hugged by someone you love, including your animals. Breathe and feel the connection deeply in your body.

6. Consider working with a team of sensitive, capable practitioners (naturopaths, physical therapists, psychotherapists, doctors, healers, shamans, teachers, artists, etc.) who will help you find the best tools for your particular needs. You’re complicated so there’s no one practitioner or one technique that will be the perfect answer. You don’t have to be alone with your anxiety. Even though you tend to solve problems for others and you may be the smartest person in the room at any particular time, don’t give up on finding help for yourself.

You may be naturally inclined to worry. Because you think a lot, it’s easy to slip into an anxious state. You have a mind that needs to be active, questioning, and dancing. Imagine that if you get more intellectual stimulation, you will worry less.

And, if all else fails, go for beauty. See the gorgeousness of the flower, the rainstorm, the laughing children. And the beauty of you. Worries and all.

____________________________

To my bloggEEs: Let us know what you worry about and how you find ways to calm and soothe yourself. If you’re a parent, these ideas apply to your children, too!

This post is part of a collection of posts about anxiety, gifted children and gifted adults. For more fascinating reading, click on the link below.