How do we define emotional intelligence when we’re talking about your rainforest mind?
Maybe you feel that you are the opposite of emotionally intelligent.
Here are some possible reasons:
You feel emotionally UN-intelligent because when you were a youngster, everyone told you that you were too sensitive, too dramatic and way too emotional.
You feel emotionally UN-intelligent because when you were a little tyke you had frequent flamboyant meltdowns.
You feel emotionally UN-intelligent because you’re easily upset by fragrances, chemicals, clashing colors, social media, depressed relatives, ignorant politicians, leaf blowers and bad architecture.
You feel emotionally UN-intelligent because you cry when you watch corny TV commercials or when you watch your child sleeping or when trees are cut down or when you read an angry Facebook post.
But what if all of the above are not indications that you are a histrionic, hysterical, neurotic, emotional cripple? But, instead, are signs of your emotional maturity, your emotional expansiveness, your emotional, yes, intelligence.
Let me explain.
A sign of rainforest-mindedness is depth. Depth, complexity, intensity. That means that you have EMOTIONS. Where your neighbor might feel sad, you feel despair. Where your uncle might feel happy, you feel joyful. Where your partner might feel angry, you feel rage. Where your classmate might feel bored, you feel desperation. Where your friend might feel nothing, you feel awestruck.
See what I mean?
And these feelings aren’t purposeless. No siree. They make you perceptive, insightful and compassionate.
That said, your EMOTIONS might overwhelm you. They may get out of control or stuck. You might feel like you’re drowning or lost or paralyzed or sick. Anxious. Depressed. Frightened.
If that happens, there are strategies. Things you can do. Read this post for some ideas. And here are more resources. And, of course, there’s my book. (And if you’re a male, this is even more complicated. Read about it here.) And, of course, if you feel anxious, depressed or frightened much of the time, seek out a sensitive therapist.
And yet. Remember this: The despair, the joy, the rage, the desperation, the awestruck-ness. None of it makes you emotionally UN-intelligent.
It makes you gifted.
To my bloggEEs: What are your thoughts about emotional intelligence? How do you cope with your intense emotions? How have your found these emotions to be beneficial? If you’re a male, how has your sensitivity been problematic? helpful?
For even more posts on the topic of emotional intelligence click on this link: